Samples (STATUTORY WARNING: Prerequisites - An emergency number, A letter signed that this post is nowhere responsible for medical emergencies if any)
Said: Arey did you see the movie DON ?
Replied: No I Java'd it
(Smug smile as if appreciating his sense of humor)
Said: Shit I have to go home tomorrow and I cannot pack these clothes.
Replied: Use Winzip raa. Compress.
(Master of sarcasm. It is just another service he offers)
Said: This time on Valentine's day I've to propose this girl so that she won't ever forget.
Replied: Me, me, me. I've got an idea. Just say "#include meinyourlife.h". System.out.println("I love you");
(Oh yes oh yes she definitely won't forget now. duh !)
Said: OK Boss. I installed the software. Now press any key to return.
Replied: I know. But I cannot find the 'Any' key on my keyboard.
(Cleverrrrr boyyy. That's it ! Can't take any more sarcasm.)
It's surprising as to how even after all these mind-numbing abominable crackers we don't hurt each other except in Counter Strike.
During our weekend presentations we receive a lot of feedback. After the respective presentations students are often told not to clench fists, not to palpitate, not to scratch armpits and specifically not to do the moonwalk. Initially lots of us had verbal handles. More often than not the sentence would be
"That means like obvious they.. that means if you but and also... Next Slide please."
"The bluetooth is blue.. blue.. blue.. bluetooth. You can transfer files, images, files, songs, files, games and files also.... Next Slide please."
Sometimes students just read lines off the slides and you cannot understand what point they are driving home.
1. The government should try and create more opportunities, services, murderers, rapists, anti - social elements.
2. And terrorists could be really be an obstruction to development and destruction.
3. And disturbances should not be practised by the youth and
4. Citizens should contribute to the government and the end.
Thank You
While you sit there trying to decipher where the statements started and ended you leave commonsense beside and instead - think of complex artificially intelligent ways to separate these lines through sophisticated context oriented speech processing multi-platform architecture driven algorithms.
The other day there was a question in our Writing Assessment.
Is there a solution for working mothers ? (and I promptly replied)
I'm sorry. I haven't been one and I cannot suggest.
Meanwhile the feminists of the class had already called upon a meeting, organized themselves into two teams (consisting of one member each) and broke down this seemingly obfuscating question into the solution by analzying the requirements, designing the implementation and testing the results. (DISCLAIMER: No coding conventions violated in the process)
I'm sure that none of you are interested in what those solutions might be any way.
Oh and finally I did come up with the solution to my incoherent perception during presentations.
1. The government should try and create more opportunities, services.
2. Murderers, rapists, anti-social elements and terrorists could really be an obstruction to development.
3. Destruction and disturbances should not be practised by the youth.
4. Citizens should contribute to the government.
The End
Thank You
All of this, thanks to my sophisticated context oriented speech processing multi-platform architecture driven algorithms.
Naresh said...
wowwwwwww.... awesome post... the jokes r masterpieces man... each of them right at the da-iict level.. am sure u must nt b missin our coll anymore...
Rock on, dude!
Unknown said...
Malavika said...
Deepu said...
Nice to see u blog. blog more often naa
said...
PSR Chaitanya said...
Has "Bobli" written all over it. [:)]
Myndfcukd said...
ankurindia said...
[Amod] said...
IT has taken its toll it seems. One more martyr, though a surprising one this time.
Rest in loop!
said...
The presentation part is very funny. Let me tell you more things here.
Same kind of people come to usa for their masters degree and they read their slides so quickly that they were asked to stop immediately and start all over again.
